so what's been up in the life of ty? nothing much, i'm still lovin' work- almost as much as justin timberlake loves McDonalds, but then again it's only been a week since my last post and i haven't done anything absurdly terrible for me to be in fear of not surviving probation....

between work and home i've been spending a lot of time by myself, it's like that redundantly boring but wholly truthful saying "i'm surrounded by people, but i'm all alone"- and i'm not entirely sure if i like being at this place, but i don't hate it.... my birthday's coming up in a few days, and i don't really want to do anything, no dinner, no movie, i just want to spend a day by myself doing my own thing, not answering my phone, going in and out of used book stores and getting lost in someone elses stories.

it's not that i wanted to post something up today, and i really shouldn't be it's nearly 11 and i need to be getting to sleep if i'm going to be even vaguely pleasant tomorrow... my fingers hit the keyboard and it felt natural for me to be typing so i'm typing, not so much thinking just typing,
and i'm remembering my days in grade 6 where my teacher had the class write letters to ourselves at the beginning of the year, stream of consciousness like, after we wrote them we sealed them up and didn't get them back till the end of the year, on the last day of class... i remember crumbling mine up and throwing it away... not that i regret it, but i realize it's a "habit" i have of not reading stuff that i've written in the past... for some reason inexplicable to me, i become embarrased and feel the insesant need to ask myself "why'd you write that", and then go into the belittling endeavor of making myself feel anything less than what i felt like before reading whatever i wrote.

memories, don't you wish you could run a virus scan through your brain sometimes and get rid of those awful memories? i want to get rid of the ones that make me feel embarrased... i've been interrupted... the joys of living with your parents! i've lost my will to continue writing.... for today... sleep and then work.

redemption

i haven't been blogging much, moslty because of the lack of time, we've had so many people come through our doors during the summer, at the end of it all i thought i was suppose to pack my suitcase and leave too... so here's my attempt at redeeming my blog:

1. work's going fantastically lovely.... or so i perceive, i'm still on probation and i've been late coming back from lunch a few times already.... i hear it'll (work) get worse as the months progress to year's end.

2. i've officially moved to the basement of our house, but don't tell my dad, he's under the assumption that my sister and i will move back upstairs in due time... but i have other plans of redecorating and rearranging to making our basement fully liveably and wholly mine...

3. my numerously abundant blogs on my desire for 'freedom' have been somewhat answered... with work there's a different kind of freedom that was different from university.... earning my own money makes me feel like i'm actually doing something besides taking random courses at my dad's expense... now i just have lunch and pay for parking at my dad's expense.... (i'm seriously not spoiled!)

(i'm going to try to make this last to at least 5 points)

4. i think i have a problem with buying dvd's... at first i bought them out of respect... as in... i respected al pacino, mario puzo, and all those involved in making the godfather so much that i bought it, then it was out of obligation... i have an obligation to uphold a good dvd collection, so i bought scarface, heat, and donnie brasco, and then i needed variety, so i bought some funny ones, and now i'ts gotten out of control... in one day i bought 9 dvds, 2 of which are still sitting in their original celophane... but let me explain... i like the matrix, the first one especially, but i liked the 2nd and 3rd ones too, so i had to get the complete collection just because you know... things intended to be in sets should be bought and kept in sets... and then they were having a sale on previously viewed dvd's a blockbuster so i got a few to keep my collection "well rounded"... i didn' t want to miss out on this opportunity at below-regular-price dvd's...

5. i've made it to 5, now i just have to to find something talk about... my "supervisor" thought it was funny that i use the word "brown" to describe myself and people that look like me... i thought it was funny that he thought it was funny... i merely stated a fact that is reflective of the community (re: physical land area) within which i live, i said "i don't j-walk, it's too much associated with brown people " (or something to that effect) which is a truth any and all of my close friends can testify to, and for that reason i won't give into a identifiably south vancouver (and some parts of surrey/delta) indo-canadian fad of j-walking... but i AM brown

An Olfactory Orgasm

so i'm standing in the deodorant aisle at the supermarket, trying to decide: would i rather smell like "april fresh" or "clean breeze"- those are my usual two choices, then i look over to my left and realize the whole 15 feet of the aisle is littered with over 25 different odour (covering) options; from "apple blossom" to "melon burst" and "rainforest rain".

out of pure curiosity i pick up the one that claims to smell like "rainforest rain"... and i'm thinking to myself, "how could the makers of this stick of deodorant possibly know what "rainforest rain" smells like??"... and a quick image of 10-15 hand picked and highly trained smellers being released into the heart of the rainforest via parachutes, enters and leaves my mind... i take off the lid and lift the "protective cap", quickly look around to make sure no one sees me- because you're not suppose to lift the "protective cap"... and smelling deodorant is generally embarrassing (especially having spent a good 10 minutes in that one aisle already).

i take a quick whiff of the stick, put the lid back on, and tilt my head back looking up at the fluorescent lights and think, "hey! it does smell like rainforest rain". for the record, i've never been to the rainforest, nor have i been in a faux-rainforest environment where it was raining... but when i smelled that deodorant... i knew. this is the smell of rainforest rain... it's like i'm there. for only $2.95 this stick of deodorant could take me to a place and give my olfactory nerves a hint of the rainforest no national geographic ever could. and now, every morning i'm taken to the heart of a rain- soaked rainforest, where wild orchids and passion fruit flowers wind around vines that spell out "Lady's Speed Stick- Rainforest Rain".

updates

i try i really try, it's not that i purposefully deny the existence of blogger, it's just that... well... first there's facebook, and then their's tv links, and then well... other stuff... that and my creativity is on a temporary hiatus.

for the few who actually continue to take the time to glance at my blog, here's what's been going on in my life:

i just got back from edmonton, a nearly annual visit where we see family, do some no-tax shopping, and enjoy some grade A alberta beef... and where i retake my oath never to leave vancouver again. nothing great happened... it was a short visit... we took as many pictures as necessary, here are some highlights:


me and my sister before ma-me-o beach, not a real beach-beach like they have here or in california, a lake beach, it was pretty though...






the yellow stuff in the background is canola, it's EVERYWHERE in edmonton,








my mom (left) and aunt (right) at ma-me-o beach








my uncle (left) and dad (right) talking business at ma-me-o beach











my sister loved ma-me-o beach











me wanting to leave ma-me-o beach already!











my aunt (far left) took us to see my cousin alson (in the t-shirt)








my cousin sabu (left) and dad (right)











my cousin ronnie (suit) and his wife christie on the left, my parents on the right








a last picture before we leave, my aunt's taking the picture










in other news.....

i got a job, finally.... it's at vancouver's top corporate law firm... it's in the heart of downtown, on the19th, 24th, 25th, and 26th floors of the TD tower, the firm is over a century old, it's a very prestigious firm. i'm not a lawyer or anything, just a clerk, but that in itself is a blessing and the whole me getting this position is all God, i can't even begin to logically comprehend how it all came together. this position is definitely a stepping stone that God has put in place. i start tomorrow, and i'm feeling somewhere between nervous and excited, definitely not scared, it's a good feeling. the happy-happy-joy-joy part of it is... well one among many... is that i'll be working downtown- i love downtown vancouver, it's what keeps me in this city, that and the clean air, and 2am sushi.

putting up all those pictures, took longer than i would have liked, i'm hungry now...

i suppose it's been a while since i last blogged, and seeing as though i put my blog address as my personal web address on the ever demanding, yet only slightly stimulating, but wholly time-consuming FACEBOOK- i feel i should keep this blog up-to-date. so what's been happening in the ever fascinating life of tyna?? nothing much... i've applied for a few jobs, been rejected, watched a few movies, went to the gym, been picked on by my father who doesn't agree with the way i wear my hair, my clothes, the way i talk, the way i pray, the amount of time i spend on the computer etc., and then counted the number of prescription pills left in the medicine cabinet-... just in case.

what's been on my mind lately? well besides the prescription pills.... getting away from home. any excuse will do, a job, school, fatal vehicular collision. i talked to a friend who basically said, "if you can get away from home, go, and never go back. i made the mistake of going back. so if you get out, STAY OUT." those are some special words i will definitely treasure in my heart for years to come.

in the meantime, i've been volunteering at the office of Ujjal Dosanjh, Member of Parliament for vancouver south. the people are really nice, and i love the atmosphere, not to mention how i love the way it looks on my resume- which at the moment is a collage of half truths and false titles.

seeing as though i'm hungry and really have nothing more to say, i bid you good day and hope for myself that i'll become somewhat more creative after the sun sets.